Quo Vado: Köln

Saturday 2/14- Before I mention my travels around Cologne, let me just say that there are some weird design touches in this hotel. For instance, mood lighting in the bathroom and by the main door. Sailing rope used as moulding. But perhaps the strangest is the huge framed 'painting' of Goethe that stares at you while in bed. Totally creepy and bizarre.

The city is huge, much more so than I thought, so the priorities are the Roman museum and the cathedral. The other Romanesque churches and museums that hold the medieval, Renaissance and modern art would have to be skipped. First the Cathedral, where I took the guided tour in English at 10:30. Very informative, but it took up some time. Only 10% of the church was lost to Allied bombing in WWII, which is a miracle. Practically every other church I have visited on this trip was partially or almost completely destroyed in the war and had to be rebuilt. After the tour and the slide show, it was 11:50. I was going to go through the church another time on my own for some more pictures, but there was a prayer service beginning, so I went to the museum.

The Römisch-Germanisches Museum turned out to be much larger than I thought. Thousands of glass and clay objects, jewelry, decorative bronzes, gravestones, and portraits. I photographed nearly everything. The highlights were several gravestones with children, a few Imperial child portraits and some toys. Unfortunately, some groups of school kids had the same idea, and, separated into boys with gladiator equipment and girls with Roman clothing, they camped out right where I needed to stand to take pictures. So annoying.

Which leads me to my next rant, that of museum behaviour and etiquette. I am a keen observer of human behaviour- perhaps due to my training as an art historian. On this trip I have seen it all- little German school children, Italian teenagers, screaming babies, Japanese tour groups, hick Americans, bumbling English people, the whole lot. Though I yearn for the day when museums open their doors just for me, that day may be far off. My visits would be at least 10-20% shorter if people wouldn't stand in my shots and where they don't need to me. Look, I'm taking multiple pictures of everything. I hate how people come to look at a random sarcophagus that I'm photographing as if I am validating its importance by studying it. IT WON'T INTEREST YOU- GO AWAY!!! Maybe if I proclaimed a bronze fibula the greatest artwork in the world, people would let me photograph what I wanted. You don't know how often I have to back away and wait while a person has to realize this for himself. Of course, there is a good deal of snobbery coming from me, but I admit it. End of rant. For now.

So I finished the museum and went back to the Dom to climb the tower, one of my favorite pastimes. The stairs were the usual winding type with some openish areas. At 323 feet, my quads were burning by the time I reached the observation level. The view was predictably fine. Downstairs, I attempted to finally go around the apse chapels to get a better shot of the Three Magi shrine, but now it was confession time. Great. I went to the train station to grab a bite to eat as I hadn't eaten all day besides a Cliff Bar I brought from the US. While there I happened upon a children's talent show thing, so I watched for a while. It consisted of German kids dressed in faux traditional dress dancing in troupes. Hard to explain, but it was very entertaining. Kind of like 'Bring It On' Deutsch-style. The judges wore getup like Shriners on acid. After this mess, I went back to the Dom for the Vigil and then home sweet home with more ill-gotten grub at the train station. So endeth the twelfth day.